Summer Holidays and Anxiety: Why this time of year can feel harder than expected

Last updated: July 2026

For many people, the summer holidays are supposed to be a time of sunshine, relaxation and making happy memories. Social media is filled with family days out, holidays abroad and smiling faces.

But if you struggle with anxiety, the summer holidays can feel anything but relaxing.

Whether you're juggling childcare, feeling overwhelmed by disrupted routines, worrying about money, or simply finding the constant pressure exhausting, rest assured you are certainly not alone.

Why does anxiety feel worse in the Summer holidays?

Anxiety often thrives when life feels unpredictable, and the summer holidays bring plenty of change.

Common reasons anxiety can increase during the holidays include:

  • Changes to your normal routine.
  • Children being home all day and needing constant attention.
  • Financial pressure from entertaining the family or paying for holidays.
  • Feeling guilty that you're not "making enough memories."
  • Social events and family gatherings.
  • Travelling or flying.
  • Comparing yourself to everyone else's "perfect" summer online.
  • Balancing work with childcare responsibilities.
  • Feeling like you never get a moment to yourself.

    When anxiety tells you you're failing

    One of the biggest challenges I see in therapy is the pressure that people often put on themselves.

    You might notice thoughts like:

    • "I should be enjoying every minute."
    • "The children deserve a perfect summer."
    • "Everyone else seems to be coping better than me."
    • "I shouldn't feel stressed when the weather is nice."

    These thoughts can leave you feeling guilty, inadequate or as though you're somehow getting it wrong.

    The truth is that anxiety often convinces us we must do more, be more and cope better. But constantly chasing impossible standards only keeps the cycle of anxiety going.

    You don't need a perfect summer

    Children rarely remember expensive days out or perfectly planned activities.

         More often, they remember feeling safe, loved and connected.

         A picnic in the park, baking together, watching a film under a blanket or simply spending time talking can often mean far more than trying             to create the "perfect" holiday.

         It's also okay if some days feel messy, disorganised and boring. 

  Looking after your own well-being     matters too

      When we're anxious, it's easy to focus on everyone else's needs while ignoring our own.

    Small acts of self-care aren't selfish; they help regulate your nervous system and make it easier to respond calmly when life feels overwhelming.

This might include:

  • Taking five slow breaths before reacting.
  • Going for a short walk.
  • Sitting quietly with a cup of tea.
  • Asking for help when you need it.
  • Lowering your expectations.
  • Saying no to commitments that leave you feeling drained.

Remember, you don't have to earn rest.

A CBT approach to Summer anxiety

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) helps you notice the thoughts that are fuelling your anxiety and learn healthier, more balanced ways of responding.

For example, instead of:

"Everything has to go perfectly today."

You might begin practising a more compassionate thought such as:

"Today doesn't have to be perfect. Good enough is enough."

Rather than waiting until anxiety disappears, CBT also encourages taking small, meaningful actions even when anxiety is present. This helps break the cycle of avoidance that often keeps anxiety going.

Alongside CBT, I often integrate mindfulness and body-based techniques to help calm the nervous system. When our body begins to feel safer, our mind is often able to think more clearly too.

If you're struggling this summer

If anxiety is making it difficult to enjoy your daily life, affecting your sleep, relationships or confidence, you don't have to manage it alone.

Therapy provides a safe, supportive space to understand what's driving your anxiety, develop practical coping strategies and build confidence in handling life's challenges.

Summer doesn't have to feel perfect.

It just needs to feel manageable.

And sometimes, reaching out for support is the most important step you can take.

Looking for anxiety counselling?

I offer online CBT and integrative counselling for adults experiencing anxiety, panic attacks, stress, low self-esteem and depression.

Together, we can work at a pace that feels comfortable for you, helping you understand your anxiety, calm your nervous system and develop practical strategies that create lasting change.

If you'd like to find out more, feel free to get in touch to arrange a free initial consultation.

parent and child sharing ice cream together

Parent Anxiety About Children Starting a New School: How to Cope with Back-to-School Worries

Feeling anxious about your child starting a new school this September? You're not alone. Whether they're beginning primary school, moving up to secondary school, or changing schools altogether, it's completely normal for parents to experience worry, uncertainty and even guilt during times of transition.

While much of the focus is on helping children prepare for a new school, parents often carry their own emotional load. You may find yourself lying awake imagining worst-case scenarios, wondering whether they'll make friends, settle in, or cope with the changes ahead.

If this sounds familiar, take comfort in knowing that your anxiety comes from a place of love. The good news is that there are ways to manage those worries so you can support both yourself and your child through the transition.

Why do parents feel so anxious about a child starting a new school?

Any period of change can trigger anxiety. Our brains naturally prefer certainty and predictability because they feel safer.

Starting a new school brings many unknowns:

  • Will they make friends?
  • Will they like their teachers?
  • Will they be happy?
  • What if they struggle academically?
  • What if they're bullied?
  • Have I prepared them enough?

These questions are understandable. The problem is that anxiety often encourages us to treat uncertainty as danger, leading us to imagine outcomes that haven't actually happened.

Remember: Children often take their emotional cues from us

Children are remarkably perceptive. Even when we try to hide our worries, they often notice changes in our tone of voice, facial expressions or behaviour.

This doesn't mean you have to pretend you're never worried. Instead, aim to model calm confidence.

Rather than saying:

"I'm so worried about how you'll manage."

You might say:

"It's normal to feel nervous about something new, but I know you'll find your feet. We'll take it one day at a time."

This communicates confidence without dismissing their feelings.

When worry becomes unhelpful

Our minds are brilliant problem-solvers, but anxiety can trick us into trying to solve problems that don't yet exist.

You may notice yourself:

  • repeatedly checking school information
  • constantly asking your child if they're okay
  • seeking reassurance from other parents
  • imagining every possible thing that could go wrong
  • struggling to concentrate on your own daily activities.

While these behaviours may bring temporary relief, they often keep anxiety going because your brain never gets the chance to learn that uncertainty can be tolerated.

A helpful CBT perspective

One of the core ideas in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is that our thoughts influence how we feel.

Notice the difference between these thoughts:

Anxious thought:
"If my child struggles at school, it means I've failed as a parent."

More balanced thought:
"Every child experiences challenges sometimes. Struggling with something doesn't mean they're failing or that I've done anything wrong."

Or:

Anxious thought:
"They must settle in immediately."

Balanced thought:
"It may take time to adjust, and that's perfectly normal."

The goal isn't to force yourself to think positively. It's about finding thoughts that are realistic, balanced and compassionate.

Practical ways to manage parent anxiety

Accept that uncertainty is part of parenting

No parent can guarantee that everything will go perfectly.

Trying to eliminate uncertainty usually increases anxiety rather than reducing it.

Instead of asking:

"How can I make sure nothing goes wrong?"

Try asking:

"How can I cope if things don't go exactly as planned?"

Focus on what you can control

You can't control every experience your child will have.

You can control:

  • creating calm morning routines
  • listening without immediately fixing
  • encouraging independence
  • communicating with school if needed
  • looking after your own wellbeing.

     

    This shift can help reduce feelings of helplessness.

    Notice your own anxious thoughts

    When you catch yourself imagining worst-case scenarios, gently ask:

    • Is this a fact or a prediction?
    • What's the evidence?
    • Is there another equally possible outcome?
    • What would I say to another parent feeling this way?

    These simple questions can help create some distance from anxious thinking.

    Look after yourself too

    Parents often put themselves last. Yet managing your own stress makes it easier to support your child.

    Small things can make a difference:

    • regular movement
    • enough sleep where possible
    • slowing your breathing when you feel overwhelmed
    • talking to supportive friends or family
    • taking short breaks from worrying.

    It's okay if your child doesn't love every day

    Many parents hope their child will come home smiling after the first day.

    Sometimes they do.

    Sometimes they don't.

    Adjusting to a new environment takes time. Feeling nervous, tired or emotional during the first few weeks is often a normal part of settling in.

    Rather than viewing every difficult day as a sign something is wrong, try seeing it as part of the adjustment process.

    When should you seek support?

    If your anxiety is becoming overwhelming, affecting your sleep, work or daily life, or you're finding yourself constantly consumed by worry, it may be helpful to talk to a therapist.

    CBT can help you understand the cycle of anxiety, develop practical coping strategies, and build confidence in managing uncertainty.

    Seeking support isn't a sign that you're failing - it's an investment in both your own wellbeing and your family's.

    Final Thoughts

    Watching your child take a new step can stir up many emotions. It's natural to want to protect them from every disappointment or challenge.

    But children don't need parents who are perfect.

    They need parents who are present, supportive and willing to show that it's okay to feel nervous about new beginnings.

    You may not be able to remove every obstacle from your child's path, but by managing your own anxiety with compassion and perspective, you can help them approach this new chapter with greater confidence - and perhaps discover some resilience in yourself along the way.